Uncle Bob's World Famous Fora    Uncle Bob's    Uncle Bob's  Hop To Forum Categories  Community Forums  Hop To Forums  Time Out!    Joke of da day
Go
New
Find
Tools
Reply
  
Joke of da day
 Login/Join
 
Fifth Column Freeper
Picture of MAXIMUS PANDAMONIUS
posted
Man to woman... "Would you have sex with me for £1,000,000?"

Woman answer... "Yes."

Man to woman... "Would you have sex with me for £10?"

Woman... "Of course not! What sort of woman do you think I am?"

Man to woman... "I know what sort of woman you are; we are now just haggling over the price!"
 
Posts: 12741 | Registered: September 24, 2009Reply With QuoteReport This Post
posted Hide Post
Yes! W.C. Fields great comic actor.
 
Posts: 38 | Registered: February 21, 2007Reply With QuoteReport This Post
Fifth Column Freeper
Picture of MAXIMUS PANDAMONIUS
posted Hide Post
You remember Fields?
WOW
 
Posts: 12741 | Registered: September 24, 2009Reply With QuoteReport This Post
Diner Gradgrinder
Picture of Ginger Quill
posted Hide Post
quote:
Originally posted by MAXIMUS PANDAMONIUS:
You remember Fields?
WOW


"Of course I love children. Well done!"
 
Posts: 929 | Registered: August 16, 2014Reply With QuoteReport This Post
Yeetcow
Picture of Jefiner
posted Hide Post
(paraphrase)

Water? I never drink it. Fish piss in it.


______________________________

Don't pet the fluffy murder cow.
 
Posts: 4682 | Registered: August 15, 2014Reply With QuoteReport This Post
Picture of Mr Breeze
posted Hide Post
Here are some water skies

All I need now, is a downhill lake

~W.C. Fields


---------------------------
Call me the Breeze -------
 
Posts: 1201 | Registered: December 04, 2015Reply With QuoteReport This Post
Fifth Column Freeper
Picture of MAXIMUS PANDAMONIUS
posted Hide Post
If you can't dazzle them with brilliance, baffle them with bull.

W. C. Fields
 
Posts: 12741 | Registered: September 24, 2009Reply With QuoteReport This Post
Fifth Column Freeper
Picture of MAXIMUS PANDAMONIUS
posted Hide Post
I spent half my money on gambling, alcohol and wild women. The other half I wasted.

W. C. Field's
 
Posts: 12741 | Registered: September 24, 2009Reply With QuoteReport This Post
Fifth Column Freeper
Picture of MAXIMUS PANDAMONIUS
posted Hide Post
You only live once, but if you do it right, once is enough.

Mae West
 
Posts: 12741 | Registered: September 24, 2009Reply With QuoteReport This Post
Fifth Column Freeper
Picture of MAXIMUS PANDAMONIUS
posted Hide Post
Job Position Posted At Local Hospital

Help needed at Our Lady Of Eternal Damnation Hospital(circumcision ward)

Pays 50 skins per week
Chance to get a head
And an occasional tip
 
Posts: 12741 | Registered: September 24, 2009Reply With QuoteReport This Post



Fifth Column Freeper
Picture of MAXIMUS PANDAMONIUS
posted Hide Post
Knock knock
 
Posts: 12741 | Registered: September 24, 2009Reply With QuoteReport This Post
Fifth Column Freeper
Picture of MAXIMUS PANDAMONIUS
posted Hide Post
Who's there?

Art

This message has been edited. Last edited by: MAXIMUS PANDAMONIUS,
 
Posts: 12741 | Registered: September 24, 2009Reply With QuoteReport This Post
  Powered by Social Strata  
 

Uncle Bob's World Famous Fora    Uncle Bob's    Uncle Bob's  Hop To Forum Categories  Community Forums  Hop To Forums  Time Out!    Joke of da day

© Copyright 2001, 2002, 2003, 2004, 2005, 2006, 2007, 2008, 2009, 2010,2011,2012, MMX™ to Infinity. All material posted at Uncle Bob's World Famous Fora is protected under the Fair Use and Educational Purposes Act of 1869 and is regulated by the sovereign nation of Unclebobistan. If you post anything here, it will probably be copied and pasted all over the Inter web and people will laugh at you. So what else is new? Your friends and family are already laughing at you. The fair use of a copyrighted work for purposes such as criticism, comment, news reporting, teaching, scholarship, parody or research may be posted at Uncle Bob's.

Uncle Bob's would like to apologize to the following people or groups of people who we undoubtedly have offended over the course of the past few years. If you feel you have been personally offended then take this apology to be specifically for you. Otherwise, we apologize to Jewish Mexicans, President Barack Hussein Obama Mmm Mmm Mmm a.k.a. Hopey McChangey, Catholic Priests who dork little boys, vegetarians, Fruit Loop, Atkins' Diet adherents and other fat-asses, Dennis J. Olson, Delta Lady, Joe and his Socks, paranoid persona's, space aliens, Illegal Aliens, Boy Scouts, same sex aficionados, Harry Reid, Nancy Pelosi, Canadians, ditch diggers, people who support the aforementioned, people on Prozac, Mel Gibson, Nazi Mods, Tiger Woods, motorcycle gang members, rag heads or towel heads or any other Middle Eastern personas or personae, Crotch Bombers, Britney Spears, the blind, the entire Gay and Lesbian community, Charlie Sheen, Black Panthers, NAACP, and anybody who has ever been called Lard Ass.