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Blackseal has passed away
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Picture of Pandy
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That must have been his ghost I spoke with today. He was really sad to hear of his demise.

1rose
 
Posts: 188 | Location: United States | Registered: October 22, 2014Reply With QuoteReport This Post
Unruly Peasant

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Had lot's of laughs here with Seal...

1rose



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Life is too important to be taken seriously. ツ

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Posts: 3194 | Location: On frozen pond | Registered: July 15, 2003Reply With QuoteReport This Post
Tardigrade A+
Picture of ANGRY RAGEHEAD
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In his honor we should make his ghost a Mod for a week

Thumbs Up

I know it is what he would have wanted

1rose


Cool2
 
Posts: 1233 | Location: Vagina Gulch | Registered: April 08, 2013Reply With QuoteReport This Post
Picture of Pandy
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I thought it appropriate to eulogize Black Seal tonight. What better way to memorialize him than by his own words? I give you an excerpt from his memoirs...

quote:
"I am a classically educated 17th century British Viceroy who through a bizarre series of events was hurled through a rift in time to the year 2253 where I became the greatest starship captain in the Galaxy. With my quick thinking, steady blaster arm, and penchant for lightly buttered lemon walnut scones Earth just might stand a chance against the constant encroachments of the Volgor horde.

I can swim up waterfalls with unparalleled speed. I have the uncanny ability to detect alien invaders masquerading as abstract sculpture. I once sang a rendition of "No woman, No Cry" that brought a tear to the eye of the Pope and elicited a rousing burst of applause from several cardinals. I can hurl Swedish meatballs with practiced ease, and marksman's accuracy. I can create small rifts in space with my hand allowing me to travel short distances instantaneously. I fight against evil but for the wrong reasons. I do a better Tom Jones impression than Tom Jones himself. My one true fear is large tropical fruit.

On Thursdays before work I bake and distribute free onion bread to orphan children. I have often been witnessed inexplicably shaking my fist in anger and mouthing xenophobic epitaphs at abstract works of art. Each day I have no less than 3, but no more than 7 epic karate adventures in my mind. No less than 3 of these daily adventures result in my imagined death. Oak leaves taste like steak to my unsophisticated palette. I change colors when wet or exposed to a concentrated neutrino burst. I refer to myself only in the third person when captured by my enemies.

In my hands a mock turtleneck becomes a deadly weapon. Amongst coyotes I am revered as an almost legendary champion. When frightened I give off a subtle pineapple scent. I always bet on black.

My dream in life is to become a mexican stick fighter. Unfortunatly I am not mexican, can't fight well, and am mortally afraid of sticks, so needless to say, accomplishing that dream will be difficult to accomplish.

Someday I hope to meet Lionel Ritchie, just on the off chance he would say "Hello, is it me you're looking for?", and then I can say "Yes".

His reaction would be pretty hillarious. I think."

This message has been edited. Last edited by: Pandy,
 
Posts: 188 | Location: United States | Registered: October 22, 2014Reply With QuoteReport This Post
Tardigrade A+
Picture of ANGRY RAGEHEAD
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quote:
No less than 3 of these daily adventures result in my imagined death.



The Man was a Visionary


This Pint is for you Mate

Beer
 
Posts: 1233 | Location: Vagina Gulch | Registered: April 08, 2013Reply With QuoteReport This Post
Picture of Helel ben Shaḥar
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Kitty Tink is upset that her litterbox cleaner is becoming compost. She has been forced to eat the meat due to lack of fresh fish. Blackie is going to have a massive hangover if he manages to wake up from this unexpected death.


"Covfefe!"

The member formerly known as Libertarian
 
Posts: 6016 | Location: SouthCentral Texas | Registered: August 02, 2010Reply With QuoteReport This Post
Picture of The Red Queen
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His head was much too small. I had it removed. My jabberwocky ate it. At McDonalds. In Manhattan. The rest of him is on the New Jersey turnpike.
 
Posts: 12 | Registered: November 14, 2010Reply With QuoteReport This Post
42 cryptotard comment points
Picture of dragon_rider
posted Hide Post
quote:
Originally posted by Pandy:
I thought it appropriate to eulogize Black Seal tonight. What better way to memorialize him than by his own words? I give you an excerpt from his memoirs...

quote:
"I am a classically educated 17th century British Viceroy who through a bizarre series of events was hurled through a rift in time to the year 2253 where I became the greatest starship captain in the Galaxy. With my quick thinking, steady blaster arm, and penchant for lightly buttered lemon walnut scones Earth just might stand a chance against the constant encroachments of the Volgor horde.

I can swim up waterfalls with unparalleled speed. I have the uncanny ability to detect alien invaders masquerading as abstract sculpture. I once sang a rendition of "No woman, No Cry" that brought a tear to the eye of the Pope and elicited a rousing burst of applause from several cardinals. I can hurl Swedish meatballs with practiced ease, and marksman's accuracy. I can create small rifts in space with my hand allowing me to travel short distances instantaneously. I fight against evil but for the wrong reasons. I do a better Tom Jones impression than Tom Jones himself. My one true fear is large tropical fruit.

On Thursdays before work I bake and distribute free onion bread to orphan children. I have often been witnessed inexplicably shaking my fist in anger and mouthing xenophobic epitaphs at abstract works of art. Each day I have no less than 3, but no more than 7 epic karate adventures in my mind. No less than 3 of these daily adventures result in my imagined death. Oak leaves taste like steak to my unsophisticated palette. I change colors when wet or exposed to a concentrated neutrino burst. I refer to myself only in the third person when captured by my enemies.

In my hands a mock turtleneck becomes a deadly weapon. Amongst coyotes I am revered as an almost legendary champion. When frightened I give off a subtle pineapple scent. I always bet on black.

My dream in life is to become a mexican stick fighter. Unfortunatly I am not mexican, can't fight well, and am mortally afraid of sticks, so needless to say, accomplishing that dream will be difficult to accomplish.

Someday I hope to meet Lionel Ritchie, just on the off chance he would say "Hello, is it me you're looking for?", and then I can say "Yes".

His reaction would be pretty hillarious. I think."

I was with Lionel last Wednesday, he will be gutted to hear of this.
 
Posts: 7938 | Registered: February 03, 2008Reply With QuoteReport This Post
Picture of Blackseal
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quote:
Originally posted by Internt Troll:
Blackseal is gone :'(


lmao I will miss me 1beer1
 
Posts: 815 | Location: Bermuda duh | Registered: August 22, 2014Reply With QuoteReport This Post
Picture of Blackseal
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quote:
Originally posted by The Red Queen:
His head was much too small. I had it removed. My jabberwocky ate it. At McDonalds. In Manhattan. The rest of him is on the New Jersey turnpike.


lmao lmao lmao This is exactly how I will die! Least I hope so! 1beer1
 
Posts: 815 | Location: Bermuda duh | Registered: August 22, 2014Reply With QuoteReport This Post



Unruly Peasant

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At times i can almost hear his laugh still, although faint and ghost-like



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Posts: 3194 | Location: On frozen pond | Registered: July 15, 2003Reply With QuoteReport This Post
43,174 Tard Points
Her Royal Tardiness,
The Alpha Purge-Mistress
"Cares With A Fist"
Picture of Traitor Vic
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Rat ate the memory rum garden I planted. A big shiny black rat.

Go figure.


........

Life's a garden. Dig it!!
 
Posts: 7892 | Registered: November 02, 2009Reply With QuoteReport This Post
Picture of Blackseal
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Posts: 815 | Location: Bermuda duh | Registered: August 22, 2014Reply With QuoteReport This Post
42 cryptotard comment points
Picture of dragon_rider
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quote:

OK anyhow I want to clear this all up for real.

I think the problem here is miscommunication.

You see in World of Warcraft there are two distinct factions in the game. There is the ALLIANCE and the HORDE. Now, each faction contains multiple races. For example, the Alliance is made up of Humans (the rest of us), Night Elves (hippies), Worgan (dogs..no seriously dogs lol), Dwarves (drunks all of them), Draenei (aliens), and Gnomes (short people). The horde factions are made up of Orcs (ugly all of them), Blood Elves (fags), Undead <-- pay attention to this one, Tauren (cows...no seriously cows lol), Goblins (short people), and Trolls (very pleasant compared to the internet kind).

Now, in the game there is a paid service called a "FACTION CHANGE". This means you can actually transfer your character from Alliance to Horde and when you do so you must choose a new race as well which belongs to the faction you are transferring to.

I think where the entire internet got confused was when I faction changed from human to undead.

Here are the results of a "faction change" below for those having a hard time following:
HUMAN SEAL


UNDEAD SEAL


You see? I went from Human (living) Seal to Undead (dead) Seal! :icon_redface:

So Blah I am sorry...even tho I was "dead" (undead) Im not really dead-dead because I've already paid US$30 and faction changed back to Human and thus your Go Fund Me Page for my funeral expenses is now null and void. I hereby request you send all currently raised funds for my funeral expenses from your Go Fund Me (ie - Seal) page to myself. I shall PM you my bank account number and be awaiting the deposit and should you fail to do so in 30 days my attorney Mr. Michael Avenatti (who happens to be very busy representing someone named a Ms. Stormy Daniels at the moment) will be in touch with you.

I don't suggest you wait that long however, as Mr. Avenatti is a very impatient and fairly cranky foul man.

Thank you for clearing this up Blah and the contributions! As always, you're a saint!

Blackseal
Seal LLC

A Bermuda Limited Liability Company
By: BlackSeal
CEO

This document for monies requested is dated May 5th and is between "Blah",., a Zetaboards member corporation, and Seal Corp., a Bermuda corporation.

Witnessed 20.15 aedt
 
Posts: 7938 | Registered: February 03, 2008Reply With QuoteReport This Post

Tard Savior
And the number of Tard Points shall be three. No more, no less.


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Posts: 2767 | Registered: March 22, 2011Reply With QuoteReport This Post
43,174 Tard Points
Her Royal Tardiness,
The Alpha Purge-Mistress
"Cares With A Fist"
Picture of Traitor Vic
posted Hide Post
That was nasty LOC, poor baby.


........

Life's a garden. Dig it!!
 
Posts: 7892 | Registered: November 02, 2009Reply With QuoteReport This Post

Tard Savior
And the number of Tard Points shall be three. No more, no less.


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quote:
Originally posted by Traitor Vic:
That was nasty LOC, poor baby.

Sorry, TV.

This thread just triggers me.

1anon
 
Posts: 2767 | Registered: March 22, 2011Reply With QuoteReport This Post
Picture of Blackseal
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LOL DR... you haven't changed have you!

Left of craze...you're a fucking ass and that gif was uncalled for and shows what you are made of doesn't it?

This is the part where I'd feel really bad if i were you or had a soul. Doubt you'll feel anything tho after posting a gif like that.
 
Posts: 815 | Location: Bermuda duh | Registered: August 22, 2014Reply With QuoteReport This Post
Picture of Blackseal
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Left Of Crazy is "triggered" about this thread lmao lmao lmao lmao

What the matter SNOWFLAKE?!! Something here bothering your sensitive psyche?!

Want to have a go on the interwebs with me snowflake? Big Grin I havent had a hobby in long time! I could have fun with you I bet!! Big Grin
 
Posts: 815 | Location: Bermuda duh | Registered: August 22, 2014Reply With QuoteReport This Post
Picture of Blackseal
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I oddly and suddenly feel very alive again lol.
Watch out! Big Grin LOL! U ABOUT 2 GET REKT!!
 
Posts: 815 | Location: Bermuda duh | Registered: August 22, 2014Reply With QuoteReport This Post



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